Self-sufficient or God-dependent?

"I know your works, that you are neither cold nor hot. I could wish you were cold or hot" (Revelation 3:15)

The sin of self-sufficiency can reek havoc in the lives of Christians. We can allow ourselves to become so comfortable in our own selves and circumstances that we can forget how much we need Jesus.

We can become so accustomed to our own 'affluency' that we tend to convince ourselves that we accomplished these things on our own. Too many times it takes a God-ordained crisis in our life to jerk our focus off of ourselves and back on to Jesus.

Sinful pride can rear its ugly head in the blink of an eye. "Look what I did" can be part of our daily vocabulary instead of "look what the Lord has done".

It is so easy to cloak ourselves with a false sense of security. We wrap it around us like a cozy blanket and snuggle up in the warmth and comfort it provides. We snuggle in the security of our jobs. Our family. Our health. We snuggle ourselves right into the lukewarm lifestyle that prevents us from passionately pursuing God and righteousness.

We can become content in what WE have accomplished instead of seeking what HE wants to accomplish through us.

Our consuming fire for Christ becomes a smoldering ember at best.

The Laodicean believers had become lukewarm. They had become comfortable in their own wealth and blinded to the actual state of their wretchedness. God told them to open their eyes that they might see. He called them to repentance.

He is doing the same for us. Our security doesn't lie with our jobs, family, friends, church or our health. Our security is solely in the hands of God. He is our sufficiency. We are affluent with the grace and mercy of our Lord and Savior. He is calling us to be a consuming fire for Him.

He is calling us to get out of the lukewarmness of our lives and be hot. Put our total trust in Him. Give Him control over our lives. Turn our self-sufficiency into God-dependency and allow Him to work His way in us.

Melissa is Home!

Melissa's last few days in Africa. Time spent at the hospital and at the clinic.

Arriving at the airport. Her plane was supposed to be on time. Showing on time. NOT on time. She was almost an hour late. At 5:00 I was getting anxious. Made for a little bit of a nervous wait. I was getting quite restless. But finally at 5:25, they landed.

I was so glad to see Melissa get off the plane. She was wearing the typical muslim dress that she had to wear while in Cameroon. I thought she looked adorable. We loaded up and she was soon sleeping peacefully for the 3 1/2 hour ride home.

Thank you, Jesus that my sweet girl is home. Thank you, Jesus for covering her. For protecting her. For growing her. For loving her. Thank you for everything you do for me. My girl is home.

Echoes and Whispers of His Presence

Coming into God's presence.

Pouring out my heart. Searching the scriptures. Seeking direction for our prayer time.

Interceding on behalf of those in need of healing, restoration, a touch.

Listening to God speak to us individually and collectively. Being a unified body of Christ.

Seeing where we have been and where we are going.

Deep calls unto deep.

The more I learn, the more knowledge I desire.

The more I seek, the deeper I want to go.

The more I find, the more I want to search.

The closer I get to Jesus, the closer I desire to be.

Oh, to be in His Presence.

Where there is peaceful exhilaration, comfort and joy.

Where the quiet speaks. Where the deep beckons. Where I feel His touch and sense His Spirit.

God, You have enlightened my understanding and opened my eyes to such awesome Truths.

You have revealed my chains of bondage and caused my soul to tremble.

Shame threatens to blanket my being with an overwhelming sense of failure.

Yet... the Sanctuary resounds with echoes of Mercy and whispers of Grace.

From my inner depths there emerges the victorious shout of an overcomer. Joy bubbles forth. Humility bows low.

I feast on His Word. I savor it's sweetness. I know He is good.

I come into His Presence.

And we are changed...

The purpose of God's discipline is changed behavior.

Ouch.. that truth hurts. There have been many times when God has chastened and disciplined my sweet little self and guess what?

My behavior did NOT change. You know why? Because I didn't really heed the discipline. I didn't really take to heart what the Lord was teaching me. Sad, but oh, so true.

There have been times that I knew without a shadow of a doubt, that God was speaking to me about a needed change on my part. A change of behavior.

I even whole heartedly agreed with Him that I need to make a change. It was something that I had been wrestling with myself about already. I had recognized that when it came to this particular emotion I was feeling - I was wrong. Plain and simple.

I knew I was wrong. I knew I needed to do something about it. I even went so far as to confess it and ask God to forgive me for it.

But that's right where it stopped. I didn't carry it one step further. I failed to get to the root of the problem and dig it up. I dealt with it at the surface level and left the roots in the ground, ready to spring up at the slightest watering. My behavior hadn't changed at all. Not one bit.

I wasn't willing to totally relinquish control of that problem to God. I was more consumed with my desire than I was with the Lord's. I was steadily convincing myself that I was justified in my thinking. I was at an impasse with God. Therefore, I would never truly experience true spiritual transformation until I gave Him complete control over that area.

I had failed to recognize the encounter I had with God. The encounter where He was gently guiding me to do what was right. To do what He was leading. To do His will.

I was just allowing myself to continue in that wrong attitude - allowing the chains of bondage to suck a little tighter around me!

It wasn't until I allowed the truth to penetrate deeply in my soul that I faced it squarely and honestly. I had to give it over and let go of it completely. Be submissive to God.

I am not really sure why I chose to hang on to that which threatened to keep me from going forward with God. Perhaps pride. Rebellion. No matter what the reason - it was plain 'ole disobedience.

I am thankful that God is patient and loving. He extended mercy to me. He ever so gently led me to the foot of the cross where I laid that behavior at His Feet.  And I left it there. Never to pick it up again. Praise you, Jesus.

"Commit your works to the Lord, and your thoughts will be established" (Proverbs 16:3)

Melissa will soon be Home!

My daughter Melissa, who is 23, has been in Meskine, Cameroon, Africa since September 11th. That is almost 9 weeks. It has been a hard 9 weeks. Hard on Melissa. Hard on her parents and sisters. Hard on my knees...

Melissa is at a mission hospital compound that is basically in the bush. Things are very primitive there. The hospital (and I use that term loosely) is so far behind in medical equipment and supplies, that she has seen things there that have utterly astounded and amazed her.  The type of anesthesia they use there is not the kind we are accustomed to here in the United States. The people that they operate on are basically put in a very sleepy state, but they aren't completely out of it. I just can't even imagine.

Melissa told me about a little 6 year old boy who had a serious bone infection in his leg and they were operating on it to remove the infection. She said, "Mama, as I looked up at the little boy during the procedure, there were tears pouring down his face. He was clearly in pain and clearly not asleep" It just broke her heart and all she could do was go to him and talk gently and pray. I cried as she was telling me about it. It just got to my heart! The doctors assured her that the little boy would not remember the pain, but it was still heart wrenching for her to see. She has seen babies die that probably shouldn't have died. She has been exposed to a side of life that isn't pretty.

Melissa has been very sick since she has been there. She has probably been sick at least 6 weeks out of the 9. Some of those weeks she was VERY ill. There is nothing worse than getting a phone call and when you pick up the receiver, all you hear is crying and the words "mama". Especially when the child on the other end is in Africa. And you're not. Hard.

It has been great to be able to talk with her through 'skype'. Sometimes I can hear her well, sometimes I can't. But at least she CAN call me when she needs me. There are good phone calls and there are not so good phone calls. There are conversations we have that are uplifting and then there have been some that have been depressing. But through it all, God has been so good. He has carried and covered her. He has ministered to her heart and soul. He has been merciful. He has been God.

Melissa has grown in the Lord through this experience. She has been forced to see that she can make it when she thinks she can't. She has learned to lean on God in all things. She has learned that she can survive without her mommy.  She has learned to trust completely in Jesus. She has learned that when nothing else is... He is...

There have been times, that she has questioned why the Lord took her all the way to Africa to keep her sick! She sees that Africa is NOT the place that she is to be. But she wondered why it would take 9 weeks for her to be shown that. Through it all, the Lord has whispered to her heart about being content. She said He speaks to her alot about the life of Paul. About doing the thing that God calls you to do without question.

The verse that she is holding tight to is this:

"But I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at last your care for me has flourished again; though you surely did care, but you lacked opportunity. Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content:" (Philippians 4:10,11)

I am looking so forward to being able to really talk with her and hear all the details about what she has seen and experienced. I know that everything the Lord is teaching her is not being learned right now. I know that some of what He is teaching her will be gleaned later. He still has much to show her. He still has much work to do. But his servant, Melissa, I think is now listening.

I am proud of my daughter. I am proud of the work that the Lord has done, is doing and will do through her. I am ready for her to come home. I am ready for the next part of her awesome journey in the Lord to begin. But all I know right now is that November 17th at 4:34 PM, my sweet baby will step off that plane in Baton Rouge, and her mama will breathe a HUGE sigh of relief. My baby is coming home.

Thank you, Jesus.

Face-to-face with Jesus!

"And every creature which is in heaven and on the earth

and under the earth and such as are in the sea,

and all that are in them, I heard saying:

Blessing and honor and glory and power

Be to Him who sits on the throne,

And to the Lamb, forever and ever!"

(Revelation 5:13)

Face-to-face fellowship with our Lord.

As I thought about that concept the other day, the Spirit of God just fell like a mighty wind on my soul and blew me away! That, my friends, is what we as Christians have to look forward to. We will see our precious Savior, our God, our King, face-to-face. Oh, can someone say Glory!

I can't even begin to comprehend how absolutely wonderful that will be. How unbelievably amazing it will be. We will actually stand before the throne of the Almighty God and see Him in ALL of His glory! Hallelujah! What a day that will be!

"They shall see His Face..." (Revelation 22:4)

I love my prayer time at my church in the late evening. There is just something so intimate about coming into the sanctuary in the peaceful darkness and then laying prostrate at the altar. Just laid out before God in total abandon. Total surrender. On my face, worshipping at His Feet.

A few weeks ago, after we had finished praying, my friend and I just sat there in silence for awhile. I couldn't take my eyes of the cross above the baptistry. We sat there talking and I said, "Can you just imagine that as good as this feels, what it will be like to be doing that for all of eternity?"

As awesome as it is here on earth, to worship our God, I can't even begin to fathom the magnitude of the awesomeness we will experience at the very throne of Grace.

We will be at His Feet in praise and worship and we will see our Lord face-to-face. We will look upon His face and see Him for who He is! We will be in the indescribable, undeniable, inexpressible Presence of our Holy God forever and ever.

No more sorrow, pain, sickness or shame. No tears, no fears, no loneliness or burdens. No feelings of inadequacies or uncertainty. No confusion or chaos. All we will experience is the pure, holy, glorious presence of God.

Pure love. Pure worship. Pure Jesus!

We will stand before Him faultless and forgiven. We will see Him in all His Glory. With exceeding joy we will fall facedown and we will worship Him forever and ever.

Face-to-face fellowship with the King of kings. The Lord of lords. The healer of our hearts. The maker of the stars. The savior of this world. The keeper of eternity.

Face-to-face with Jesus.

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Thanks, Joanne for Growing up Mondays!

The cleft of the Rock - Mercie update

"So it shall be, while My glory passes by, that I will put you in the cleft of the rock, and will cover you with My hand while I pass by." (Exodus 33:22)

Oh, praise God for the cleft of the Rock! A place where He hides our soul. Covers us with His Hand. Protects us from the enemy. A place of solitude. Rest. Rejuvenation.

A place where His glory passes by and we are tucked safe in the cleft, yet still feel His presence in a mighty way.

The cleft of the Rock is a place of safety. A place of glorious refuge.

Sometimes God has us nestled in the cleft to teach us. To enlighten us. To grow us.

Sometimes we are hidden in the cleft for protection. Protection from others. Protection from ourselves.

Sometimes we are in the cleft of the Rock so God can show us His glory. Remind us of who He is. Remind us of what He can do. Remind us of who we are. Refresh our memory as to who is in control.

There is peace in the cleft. There is rest in the cleft. There is sweet mercy in the cleft.

Oh, Father, when you tuck me away in the cleft of Your Rock, help me to see what you have for me there. Help me to be mindful of your purpose and your will. May I be content in the cleft. May I always seek you with all of my heart and desire nothing less than your will for my life. Oh, Lord, show me your glory! Do awesome things through me and with me.

"For it is an awesome thing that I will do with you" (Exodus 34:10)

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Thank you for your prayers for Mercie. Her fever came down from 103.9 to 100. They ran 2 bags of Rocephin through her and her white count was better this morning. She is home and feeling much better! I am so thankful for the power of prayer. He worked a miracle in her little life last night and I am praising His name! He kept sweet Mercie in the cleft of the Rock!