A Little Bondage Perhaps?

I have been studying about bondage and strongholds lately. It's a little funny to me that sometimes we think that we don't have any. Can you imagine? I have actually thought to myself, "I don't have any bondage in my life". Oh, man, was I ever deceiving myself!

I am a perfectionist. It's something that I have always considered a good thing. I mean, I love a very neat house. I just love to clean (really!). Everything in my house has a place and I like them in it.. My husband has told people, that if he get's out of bed at night to go to the bathroom, that I will make up the bed behind him! I just love things to be orderly and sometimes I admit I am a little excessive. My kids will tell me, "Mama, just sit down and relax!". And I wonder why I have high blood pressure...

I have rewritten my LPM scripture memory cards 4 times. I am absolutely not kidding. The first several times, I just couldn't get them to look the way I wanted. Then when I was adding my last scripture, I couldn't find the same kind of pen that I had been using (in different colors of course) so I redid them all. I hope that y'all don't think less of me =)

So as I was studying today and reading "Living Free", guess what just jumped out of the book and into my heart? Perfectionism is a stronghold. It's bondage. Perfectionism is bondage, because it is something that we can't ever obtain. There is only One Perfect being and that is God. If we strive for things that are unattainable, we set ourselves up for failure and disappointment. Then we think that we are unpleasing to God and then our human nature causes us to think that we are spiritual failures. It can cause us to doubt our salvation and it spins us into a vicious cycle.

* we renew our commitment to the Lord
* something happens and we feel like a failure
* we become angry at ourselves for "failing"
* then the feeling of despair sets in

So then our thoughts turn inward and our focus is on our own inadequacy. It begins to exalt itself in our thoughts. So the quest for perfectionism thus becomes the quaking of our spiritual lives and then it becomes the graveyard of our growth process.

"For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ." (2 Corinthians 10:4-5)

This applies to anything in our life that is perhaps taking a stronghold effect on us. We have to realize that we cannot please God by being perfect. If we focus on our sins and our inadequacies, we are not pleasing Him. The only focus that will change our lives is if we steer our focus to God. The more we focus on Him, the less we will focus on ourselves. My over obsessive behavior in essence takes over my ability to keep my sights on Him. If I am too full of my self, there is no room for God.

Our focus has to be in His Word and in prayer. Like the scripture says, we have to take our thoughts captive to Christ and make His thoughts our thoughts. We have to make Him our focus. More of Him, less of me.

Lord, help me to realize that when I think I am trying to strive for perfectionism, I am really striving for the unattainable. Help me to put You first. I want to make Your thoughts, my thoughts. I want my focus to be on You. I want to be more like You, Lord. Help me to break out of the bondage and into the glorious light of freedom!