I was doing my bible study last night and I experienced something that I wasn't too proud of. As I got to a passage of scripture, conviction just flew off that page like it was on fire, and just almost knocked me to the ground.
I had just been on the computer for the first time since posting that morning and I noticed that there hadn't been much activity on my page. I also noticed that I had lost a reader :(. I am going to be brutally honest here - for just a brief moment, my heart hurt. I thought - "oh, my, what did I do wrong?" I even wondered if I should even continue to blog! I was just sorta down and out and I didn't stay on the computer very long. I was acting pitiful. Just pitiful.
I took a hot bath. I had been for my yearly woman's check-up AND to the dentist that day, so I desperately needed a bath. You know how I love a hot bath. Well, then I went to my desk to read God's Word and pray. Here's what jumped right out of the bible at me - talking about the Pharisees in John 12:43:
"for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God"
Whoa.. Oh, my.. did I ever hang my head in shame. Was I putting more stock into the praises of men? I immediately dropped my head onto the pages of my bible and confessed right then and there.
My desire and my purpose is ONLY to bring glory to my precious savior. I want nothing more than to minister to the hearts of others, just as all of you minister to my heart each day. Nothing I do is for my vain glory. I can't make it about me. I so desire to use this venue to bring myself and others closer to Him.
I want to increase my commitment to Him, deepen my knowledge of Him, broaden my love for Him and share my testimony about Him.
Thank you precious Lord for keeping my feet on the right path. Your Word never fails to give me the direction I need. May I always remember that my purpose is You.
It's not about the world. It's not about me. It's about JESUS.